uSu - united States underground                         By:Mind Bender
	
	60 Phun Things to do in  a supermarket


Weeeeeeeee!, here we go with another fun filled annoyance file!


1. Go up to the asshole at the counter and ask for grey poupon. 

2. Apply for one of those stupid savings cards with the name 
	Hugh G. Rection, Ben Dover, or I.P. Freely

3. Take out a knife and slash any plastic products you can find.

4. Urinate in the Ice Freezer

5. Urinate in the Ice Cream Freezer

6. Take the tops off all the milk

7. Open every single bag of chips in the store

8. Urinate in the change slot of the coke machine

9. Run around the store and squirt people with paint.

10. Or even better, urinate on them!

11. Put the butter on the ground and jump on top of it.

12. Take a pack of american chese and put your foot print in it.

13. Call the cashier "Garcon"  (Garr-sone)

14. Ask where the birth control devices are.

15. When you can't find them, take some ballons and ask the clerk if
	this is it

16. Sit in the checkout line and tell people about what is in the 
	food they are buying.

17. Put the laundry detergent on the floor and watch the performance.

18. Run up and down the isles knocking everything off the shelves.

19. Ask a clerk if lemon scented Dawn contains urine

20. Scream really loud while waiting in line.

21. Faint and watch the fun.

22. Set the phones on ringback and watch the fun.

23. Sit in front of the revolving doors and stare like you're amazed.

24. Talk with an english accent.

25. Ask the cashier if they cash bounced checks.

26. Comment on the scent of the store.

27. Go around and ask people if you can ride in their carts.

28. Say the dog food looks more appealing that the stuff at the deli
	counter

29. Open up some dog food and say it's a special breakfast treat.

30. Tell the clerk he looks like a freak.

31. Steal all the coupons from the handouts.

32. Tear everything off the bulletin boards.

33. Yell "Fire!!!" really loud.

34. Ask people in line for change.

35. Point at someone, and yell really loud "No thank you Mr. Drug Dealer!"

36. Tell dirty jokes really loud.

37. Ask the clerk why he/she is blushing.

38. Try and pick up clerks of the opisite sex.

39. Better yet, try and pick up clerks of the same sex.

40. Play hall hockey with a glass bottle in the isles.

41. Wear a big raincoat and walk around like a flasher.

42. Show your stuff!

43. Make nasal sounds in line.

44. Phrophetsize about the end of the world

45. Enter the express line with way too many items.

46. Throw shit at people

47. Ask where the wine is.

48. Ask for a spare uiform.

49. Ask for a cigar.

50. Pop the bags of chips.

51. Remark about how cold all these shitty places are.

52. Take all the expenisve cheese and stomp on it.  Makes some
	neat looking artwork!

53. Go to the deli counter and ask for 6 pounds of something
	no one would want (like Olive-loaf) as they turn to slice it,
	run like hell.

54. Take out your friendly squirt gun and have a big war
	(or painballs) see how long it takes to get thrown out!

55. Take the instant coupon machine(if your supershit has
	one you know what i am talking about) and jam
	the hell out of them, litteraly!

56. Or take a long hard stick of salami and beat the shit outta of
	an instant coupon machine with it.

57. Put a salami stick in your pants and walk around.

58. Urinate on the Produce

59. Play hall hockey with a glass jar.

60. Paste this on the bulletin board.

Well thats it.  Go break something!                     
					-Mind Bender