Element : Woman 
Symbol : Wo 
Discoverer : Adam 
Atomic Mass : Accepted as 53,6 Kg but may vary from 40 Kg
                      to 200 Kg 
Occurrence : Common and widespread in urban Areas 

Physical properties 

1) Surface usually covered with painted film 
2) Boils at nothing, freezes withouth any known reason 
3) Melts if given special attention 
4) Bitter if incorrectly used 
5) Found in various states from virgin metal to common ore 
6) Yelds to pressure applied to correct points 


Chemical properties 

1) Has a great affinity to gold, silver, and range of prcious stones 
2) Absorbes great quantities of expensive substances 
3) May explode spontaneously withouth warning and for no
    known reason
4) Insoluble in liquids, but activity increased by saturation in 
    alcohol
5) Most powerful money reducing agent known
6) Several allotropes commonly found eg: divorcee, Dolly bird,
    Shrew, Nag 


Common Uses 

1) Highly ornamental, especially in sports car 
2) Can be a great aid to relaxation 
3) Very effective cleaning agent 


Tests 

1) Pure specimens turn rosy pink when discovered in natural state 
2) Turns green when placed beside better specimen 
3) Prime specimen exhibit strong magnetic attraction which decays
    with age 


Potential hazards 

1) Highly dangerous except in experienced hands 
2) Illegal to possess more than one concurrently, although several
    can be mantained at different locations as long as specimen do
    not come in direct contact with each other: severe explosion
    risks!!!!
3) May unexpectedly change state, esp. after application of gold ring
4) Precautions against mutiplication sometimes required, eg. 
    Rubber glove :-) 

Antidote 

A mixture of sport and alcohol provide short term relief from
symptoms but only permanent cure is Misogyny or Homosexuality.
In case of severe contamination seek immediate attention from
clergyman